Is it weird to want my boyfriend to wear panties?

Abbie

“Is it weird to want my boyfriend to wear panties?
Part of me finds the idea really attractive, but I don’t know what that says about me.”

There’s a specific kind of bravery in this question — not because of what you’re asking, but because you’re willing to look at it honestly.

Let’s be clear first.

This isn’t strange.
It’s just… unspoken.

What you’re describing isn’t really about panties.
It’s about wanting to see a softer, unfamiliar side of someone you love — one that feels open, maybe even vulnerable in a way you don’t often get to see.
And that kind of vulnerability can feel quietly intimate.

 How to actually say it

The biggest mistake people make here is turning this desire into a request before it’s a conversation.
You’re not asking him to do something. You’re showing him a piece of you.

Try opening a door instead:

“Can I tell you something a bit random I’ve been thinking about?”

That framing matters. It signals curiosity, not pressure.

Then keep it centred on your experience — not his obligation.

“I think I’d find it really attractive to see you in something softer… maybe even something like what I wear.”

Now it’s shared, not assigned.
It becomes playful exploration, not performance.

What you’re really testing

You’re not just asking, will he wear them?
You’re really asking:

• Can we talk about things that feel tender?
• Can we explore without judgement?
• Can we be playful without making it heavy?

That’s the real question of intimacy here.

And if he hesitates

That’s okay.
A pause isn’t a rejection — it’s reflection.
This might be unfamiliar territory, and people need time to process new dynamics.

Give him space without withdrawing.
That balance — curious, but calm — is how trust grows.

Abbie’s final thought

The strongest relationships aren’t the ones that avoid moments like this.
They’re the ones that can hold them — with gentleness.

Because sometimes intimacy doesn’t start with certainty.
It starts with:

“This might sound a bit different…”

Abbie