I Love Seeing My Husband in Stockings — Is That Normal?

Dear Abbie,

This might sound unusual, but I love seeing my husband in stockings. It started as a bit of fun, but I’ve realised I genuinely like it. He feels nervous about it and keeps asking if I think it’s strange. I don’t. I find it intimate, playful and surprisingly attractive. Is this something we should just enjoy, or is it too odd to admit?

You’re not strange for liking this.

And no—it isn’t strange that he wears them.

What’s happening here is actually quite simple.

It just doesn’t feel simple, because no one talks about it openly.

Is It Normal for a Man to Wear Stockings?

You’re really asking if it’s normal for a man to wear stockings.

It is.

But that’s not the part that matters most here.

What matters is what it means between the two of you.

Because this isn’t really about stockings.

It’s about what they change.

What You’re Actually Responding To

You’re not reacting to the stockings themselves.

You’re reacting to the shift.

The moment where he steps slightly outside the version of himself he usually presents—and lets you see that.

That can feel:

• more intimate
• more playful
• more honest

And for many women, that’s unexpectedly attractive.

Not because it’s dramatic.

Because it feels real.

Why He Feels Unsure

When he asks if it’s strange, he’s not really asking about the stockings.

He’s asking:

“Does this change how you see me?”

That’s the part underneath it.

Because men aren’t given much room to explore anything that sits outside a narrow idea of how they’re supposed to be—even in private.

So even if he enjoys it, there’s a risk attached.

And your response is what either removes that risk—or quietly reinforces it.

The only place this becomes uncomfortable is if it stops being chosen.

If it turns into:

• something expected
• something repeated
• something either of you feels you have to perform

…it loses what made it appealing in the first place.

Right now, it works because it’s private.

Because it’s yours.

Because it isn’t trying to be anything else.

Keep it that way.

What It Means (And What It Doesn’t)

It doesn’t automatically mean anything bigger.

Not a label.
Not a change in identity.
Not something you need to define.

Sometimes it simply means:

He likes how it feels.
You like how it looks.
And together, it creates something that feels a little different from the everyday.

That’s allowed to be enough.

Abbie’s Final Thought

No, this isn’t strange.

What’s unusual is how quickly people assume it should be.

You’ve found something that feels:

• intimate
• honest
• shared

Not performed. Not explained. Not borrowed from anyone else’s expectations.

Just yours.