
Abbie
I often dress up in sexy stockings and suspenders from your site for my husband, he loves it. But recently, I’ve developed a burning desire to see him dressed in stockings and suspenders too.
I even purchased a stockings set, which he thought was for me, but I didn’t have the nerve to ask him to wear it. Am I crazy about this idea, and should I just drop it?
Abbie's answer

First of all, let me reassure you: you’re not crazy! It’s perfectly normal to have desires and fantasies, even ones that feel unconventional. Exploring new dynamics and playful ideas in the bedroom is part of what keeps a relationship exciting and intimate. Your curiosity is a sign of trust and openness in your relationship, and that’s a beautiful thing.
Let’s look at how you can approach this in a way that feels comfortable and respectful for you and your husband.
1. It’s Okay to Have Fantasies
Fantasies and desires are a natural part of human sexuality, and yours is no exception. Wanting to see your husband in stockings and suspenders isn’t strange—it’s simply an idea that excites you, just like how he enjoys seeing you dressed up.
Many couples love swapping roles, exploring lingerie together, or trying something outside of traditional norms. It’s about fun, connection, and building intimacy.
2. Check In with Yourself
Before discussing this with your husband, it’s helpful to clarify your feelings. Ask yourself:
- Why does this idea of him wearing stockings and suspenders excite me?
- Is it about role reversal, curiosity, or simply the aesthetic of him in lingerie?
- How important is it to me that he tries this?
Understanding your motivations will help you communicate your desires clearly and honestly.
3. Start the Conversation Gently
Bringing up a new idea in the bedroom can feel nerve-wracking, but communication is key to a healthy, adventurous relationship. Here’s how you might approach it:
a. Choose the Right Moment
Pick a time when you’re both relaxed and open to conversation—perhaps during a quiet evening or after a positive intimate moment. Avoid bringing it up during a rushed or stressful time.
b. Frame It as Playful and Light
You could start with something like:
“I’ve been thinking about something fun we could try. You know how much I enjoy dressing up in stockings and suspenders for you? Well, I’d love to see you in something similar—it’s been a little fantasy of mine.”
This keeps the tone playful and removes any pressure or judgment.
c. Acknowledge His Feelings
If he seems unsure or surprised, inform him you’re not trying to push him into anything uncomfortable. For example:
“I completely understand if it’s not something you’re into, but I thought it could be fun. I’d love to hear what you think.”
4. Be Prepared for Different Reactions
It’s important to remember that your husband might react in a variety of ways:
- Curious or Excited : He might be open to the idea and even intrigued by trying something new.
- Hesitant but Willing : He may need time to process the idea but could agree to try it for you.
- Uncomfortable : If he’s firmly against it, respect his boundaries and avoid pressuring him.
His reaction isn’t a reflection of your idea being “wrong”—it’s simply about personal comfort levels.
5. Offer a Low-Stakes Way to Try It
If he’s open but unsure, suggest starting with something small:
- He could try just the stockings or a simple piece of lingerie to see how it feels.
- Frame it as a fun, private moment between the two of you rather than a dramatic role reversal.
Reassure him that it’s about exploring new things together, not changing who he is.
6. If He’s Not Interested
If your husband ultimately isn’t comfortable dressing up, don’t take it personally. Everyone has their own boundaries, and it’s important to respect them.
You can still enjoy your love of lingerie and perhaps find other ways to explore your fantasies—through role-play, sharing thoughts during intimate moments, or focusing on what excites you both.
Conclusion to him wearing Stockings and suspenders
You’re not crazy, and you’re certainly not alone in having this kind of fantasy. The fact that you’re thinking about how to approach it shows how much you value your relationship and your husband’s comfort.
Whether he’s open to the idea or not, the most important thing is fostering a relationship where you both feel safe expressing your desires. Keep the lines of communication open, and don’t be afraid to explore your fantasies together—at a pace that feels right for both of you.
Abbie
Abbie is the agony aunt for those trying to navigate the lingerie world. As an online lingerie owner, I help my customers with everything – from relationship problems to finding the sexy nightwear that will excite your partner to tips and tricks on making lingerie more comfortable.
Do you have a question for Abbie?
To answer the questions you might be too shy to ask your friends. Abbie is your lingerie fairy godmother.
Email abbie@quinnbeauty.co.uk
